Let Your “Yes” Mean “Yes”

How often do you say “Yes” or hear “Yes” in response to a request, and know or find out that it really means “No”?  If you’re “out and about”, the truthful answer is “too often”. 

Daily, we even hear “spokespersons” and “experts” responding to questions in the affirmative by starting their reply with “No” then giving the rest of their answer as “Yes”.  This carries a lot more baggage than merely “mixed signals”, providing an escape clause for someone to almost inevitably saying “You weren’t listening” or “You misunderstood me”!

The “yes, no” problem is similar to everything being “I, me, my” –if it’s thought to be good for the speaker, and “you, yours” when it’s either assigned to be the hearer’s problem or, a misrepresentation to convince the listener that the problem is yours.

The next-worst answers are “Yes and No” and “Maybe”, usually followed by an obfuscating explanation.  We’re programmed in the “success culture” to be required to deliver an answer no matter the untrustworthy, vacuous, or downright intentionally deceitful nature of the reply.  The right answer is very often “I don’t know, and I’ll find out before I give you an answer”, or a specific reference to someone who DOES know and is trustworthy.

This is not a new problem.  St. Paul, speaks of this human error and the trustworthy response to it in The Holy Bible in 2 Corinthians chapter 2.  Look it up, ponder what it teaches! 

Is your Yes suspect because you are a manipulator, or a sycophantic “Yes-man” or “Yes-woman”?  Or is your Yes because you KNOW, are accountable, have integrity and can deliver – a “Go To” person to get things done and to deliver Truth?

Let Your “Yes” mean “Yes and your “No” mean “No”!


About randysrules

From a professional background in architecture, community and regional planning, urban design, leadership, and fine arts, this blog provides insights on ethics, leadership, architecture/planning/urban design, Venice, and whatever intrigues me at the time. Enjoy!
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